Dear Ms. Luria,
“The new rules are cool!” I think because we do rules every day. “I hope Ms. Luria will read the anger book today,” It is fun to read. “I hope we keep doing it,” I think.
Two things I like in Ms. Luria’s class are the rules and the anger book. I’ve liked the new rules. They help the class pay attention. It’s something I will do when I’m a teacher. How do you think my class will like it?
I am really happy to be in your class so that I can learn the new rules. I will be glad to do different rules. I like trying different things. It is very wonderful being in your class Ms. Luria.
I am going to be a good teacher. That lights up my day. That is what I want to be a teacher. Do you think I could get there? I like the motions we use to say the rules. I appreciate you because you help us to be smart. I really think you should be a 5th grade teacher.
I enjoy the anger book. The anger book helps me learn. I think it is also fun to learn new things. I like it when you read it. Ms. Luria said “When you get angry you shut down.” I thought about that and it is true. I think the book helps everyone. I am happy to read this very good book. A lot of people said they learned something.
I think Ms. Luria likes reading it to the class. I really like the part when it says you flames get higher if you don’t calm down. The book helps people understood why they got upset. I know these are twelve chapters.
Hi! You have a positive attitude about learning, which I admire a lot. It will help you be a great teacher someday.
ReplyDeleteOne sentence I especially like is when you say you light up when you think about being a teacher. "That lights up my day."
How do you think other people feel when they see you "light" up?
Corinna
Your class obviously has some great new rules, and the anger book sounds like a great idea.
ReplyDeleteAs for your writing, your word choice is really good, and your voice shines through in this. I feel like I know you a bit just from reading it because you let your personality show.
Two areas to grow would be: first, how you use quotations. Your first two quotes are confusing. Why did you use quotes there? But the second two (what you thought and what Ms. Lucia said) were excellent examples of quotes. The second area to improve is how you organize your ideas. You have great ideas but they are all over the place! Use one paragraph to talk about one idea (for example, one paragraph one the new rules and what you feel about them, one paragraph on the anger book, one paragraph about your dream to be a teache and use these things in your own class).
Overall, an engaging piece of writing. Keep it up!